Thursday, December 23, 2010

In An Attempt to Be Cool (And Fashionable)(And Cheap)

And now for a break from my normal blogging fare.

It's not that I don't know what's in style or what the latest fads are. It's not that I'm afraid to dress in fads. It's not that I don't want to spend money on clothes that make me look and feel fashionable.

It's just that it's so not practical.

I don't have a job and on average I leave the house only once a week without the kids. Otherwise they are always with me. So there's a rotation. A rotation of really good-fitting jeans and really good-fitting yoga pants paired with cheap tank tops under cheap long-sleeved t-shirts of all different colors. Sometimes I go wild and wear a cardigan. But that would only be for special occasions. Like going to the nice grocery store instead of the cheap, ghetto one that more fits our budget.

And then there's these or these which I wear every single day. Why? Because they slip on. Who has time to tie shoes when there's two kids tugging at every ligament by the back door?

Then there's the whole money thing. It just doesn't seem right to spend money on fun clothes that I will wear only a handful of times per year. Plus there's that whole thing about my kids needing to eat. And it's usually nice to have heat during a Minnesota winter. And I don't want to get too greedy but a box of diapers every few weeks really makes my life feel full of riches.

But with all those reasons going against me, something set off a spark anyway. Maybe it was buying all the new clothes for Christmas for EVERY ONE ELSE. Or maybe it was the ridiculous holiday discounts I found. Or maybe, and let's be honest, this is probably the most likely, it's that the days are inching closer and closer to my 30th birthday and I'm desperately trying to defy time by saying, "No! Look! I don't look like a 30-something mom yet! I can still be a cool 20-something-er!"

So here's what I did. I hauled two squirmy kids into the dressing room with me. And pulled them up. Zipped and buttoned. I did a few squats to really make sure everything fell into place. Lucy looked in the full-length mirror and copied me. I turned around and looked at my back side. So did Lucy. No muffin top! I made the leap and bought them. Maybe only because they fit. Maybe only because they were $15. Fifteen dollars! My first ever pair of skinny jeans.

Then I was on the hunt for the perfect pair of tall boots to go with them.

Wait. Scratch that. Do-over.

Then I was on the hunt for the perfect pair of cheap tall boots to go with them.

Turns out such a thing does not exist. Or at least it doesn't exist in a size 8 1/2. However, if you're a size 6 or a size 10 you're golden.

But when God closes a door he opens a window. In my case He opened a window to reveal a pair of patent leather red pumps. Gorgeous! On sale from $60 to $18. Eighteen dollars! Gorgeous-er!

What's that you say? You want to see pictures?



Totally not almost 30, right?

Comments, suggestions welcome.  Teasing, disparagement is not.

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